Creating a Sense of Gratitude in your Life. Every Day.

To start the year off right, try these simple practices to cultivate gratitude.  When you're feeling blue or frustrated, use them as tools to get you back to a positive head space.

Stop Complaining.  About people, situations and events that make you unhappy, sad or depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy.  No situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to.

Commit To Your Goals.  When we look for positivity in the little things that make our lives worthwhile, we leave no room for negativity and our goals come to the forefront. Instead of recounting all events of the day, filter out only the positive ones and make a note of them. It could be anything trivial, from your bus arriving on time, your mom cooking a delicious breakfast, to remembering to pay the bills on time. You would not believe how this helps you achieve your goals — by clearing the mind.

Be Kind.  To yourself and others.  It's scientifically proven to make you feel good.  Helping someone selflessly releases serotonin in your brain and hence makes you feel good about yourself almost instantly. Try doing one act of kindness every day to flush out the toxins of depression from your system.

Practice Forgiveness.  Hatred is a negative feeling and harboring it will have nothing but negative effects on your well-being. Stop thinking about the hateful emotion/person and let it go. Remember to forgive yourself too.  

Release The Past.  When you find yourself thinking that the past looked so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening - Stop.  Remember that the present is all you have.  Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

Be Optimistic.  Treat failure as an opportunity to learn a new and better lesson from life.  Never give up trying. Once you start harboring an optimistic attitude towards life, success will automatically follow.

Don't be Afraid to Dream.  Dreams motivate, inspire and expand our sense of self. They also make us happy because they give our lives a sense of purpose. Happy people usually love what they do, and if they don’t, they love who they are. Dreams remind us who we are.

Care For Your Body. Your physical condition has a direct connection with your well-being. A fit body and healthy mind is reflective of happiness. Start working towards the
health of your physical, mental and emotional energy by caring for your body.  Exercise and meditation help calm your nerves, soothe your mind and elevate your mood.

Give.  Cultivate a habit of sharing with others — your money, knowledge, service, wisdom, care, love.  Giving has many unexpected benefits from attracting more happiness into your life, to inspiring others, and changing the lives of those you touch. In the end the whole world is made into a better place. Ask, “how can I serve?” Pay it forward. Give freely.

By practicing these steps daily and being conscious of them, you will learn gratitude at a level you could never appreciate before. You’re made out of love, and there’s an opportunity at every corner to show it.  Excerpted from wake Up World

 

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.”  - Denis Waitley

One In, Two Out

sim·plic·i·ty  (noun)

1.  the state, quality, or an instance of being simple.
2.  freedom from complexity or intricacy.
3.  absence of luxury, pretentiousness, ornament, etc.; plainness.
4.  freedom from deceit or guile; sincerity; artlessness.

As you find yourself putting away those new Christmas acquisitions, consider what you already have.  If you're reading this blog, then you likely have more than you need.  Start the new year on a new, simpler trajectory with the One In, Two Out Rule.  Whenever you bring a new item in, you have to get rid of two others - preferably by gifting or donation, not in the landfill.  Make one of your new year's resolutions that of simplicity.

Simplicity isn't about martyrdom, or being boring.  Simplicity is all about finding the greatest value in our lives and then staying right there in that sweet spot. When we hit that sweet spot we need to really believe that any more would be excess and may even reduce the value in our lives.  This creates more space and awareness for what really matters in our lives - shelter, food, friends.  The second we lose sight of our basic needs is the second we lose the ability to embrace simplicity and enjoy our satisfaction with just enough.

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.”   - Leonardo da Vinci

 

 
Minimalism as a lifestyle looks different for everyone, but we can all experiment with minimalism similarly. Boundaries and challenges allow us to test the waters and find the sweet spot.  That sweet spot will change depending on who you are, where you live, who lives with you and what is most important to you.

Here are some tips to help you simplify:

1.  Ask yourself, could you be just as happy without this thing? You have to determine if this thing in your life is adding to your happiness/satisfaction.  If it isn’t, get rid of it right now!
2.  Determine the actual part of this thing that positively affects you. This will need to be revaluated every so often as the flow from a want to a need can be a slippery slope.

So, let's talk a bit more about the difference between a want and a need.  The difference is pretty simple, in theory.

Need - something you have to have
Want - something you would like to have

Everything that goes beyond this – a big house, name-brand clothes, fancy foods, a new car – is a want. But, we are marketed to constantly with the message that these things are really needs.  Take control of your mind and stop (literally) buying into corporate brainwashing.
Simplicity is not a destination, simplicity is about choice.  Making your own choices based on what is truly satisfying, and not simply believing what you're told.  Savor Simplicity by choosing to:

• Consume less, and don't think of items as disposable.  Remember that just because something goes in the trash doesn't mean it ever really goes away.
• Don't spend more than you earn.  Debt is the antithesis of living a life of simplicity.
• Wake up 10 minutes early and spend the beginning of your day stretching, or being quiet instead of rushing to get out the door.
• Take a digital sabbatical instead of being overwhelmed with information.
• Take charge of your worry instead of letting anxiety take over your day.
• Be unproductive instead of killing yourself to get it all done.
• Eat food that makes your body feel good instead of feeding your feelings with food that wears you down.
• Celebrate your progress instead of beating yourself up for what you haven’t achieved.
• Be grateful for who you are now, instead of guilty for who you were then.
• Measure yourself by the person you are, not the things that you get done.
• Meet up with friends instead of feeling lonely.
• Choose solitude instead of trying to navigate through the noise.
• Go outside and appreciate nature instead of cleaning your house.
• Support good people doing great things instead of complaining about bad people doing bad things.
• Dress with less, buy second-hand, or learn how to sew instead of buying lots of cheap fast-fashion.
• Give more and take less.

A clutter free home and debt free lifestyle do not necessarily result in simplicity. But both of those things are really helpful in clearing your mind and giving you more freedom to live life on purpose.  Excerpted from BeMoreWithLess.com

“It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease. Hack away

at the inessentials.”   - Bruce Lee

 

 

Lessons from the Wild #5

There are many lessons to be learned from the natural world. Take trees, for example. Forests cover almost one third of the land area of our planet. They help protect, sustain and improve supplies of fresh water. They purify the air and convert carbon dioxide, water, minerals and sunlight into nutrients and oxygen. And they support a wide variety of life, including many plants, insects, fungi, reptiles, birds, and mammals.

What life lessons can we learn from trees? 

• Be flexible, so you don't break when a harsh wind blows.
• Cycles are a part of life.
• Leaves, though they can be small, are vital to the life of a tree. So value the little things.
• Even a mighty oak grows from a small acorn. Do not be intimidated by small beginnings.
• Sometimes you have to shed your old bark in order to grow.
• In forests, individual trees support one another. How much support do you share with those around you? Teamwork can accomplish much more than the sum of individual efforts, often making the difference between success and failure. 
• Your success and wisdom of life depends on how extensive your root system is, and how solid your principals are. 
• Avoid people who would like to cut you down.

"Your deepest roots are in nature. No matter who you are, where you live, or what kind of life you lead, you remain irrevocably linked with the rest of creation."  - Charles Cook

Lessons from the Wild #2

Another incredible reminder that being in nature serves - especially when backpacking with minimal provisions - is the value of simplicity.  

"I do believe in simplicity. It is astonishing as well as sad, how many trivial affairs even the wisest thinks he must attend to in a day; how singular an affair he thinks he must omit. When the mathematician would solve a difficult problem, he first frees the equation of all incumbrances, and reduces it to its simplest terms. So simplify the problem of life, distinguish the necessary and the real. Probe the earth to see where your main roots run."   - Henry David Thoreau

Simplicity happens on two levels: the external and internal. Obviously, as people slow down the pace of their lives, they have more time and energy to engage in earth-friendly practices and to be of service to others. But something else takes place on an internal level. When we remove the material and scheduling clutter from our lives, we seem to open up the space within ourselves for deep caring - caring for the earth, other people, future generations, and life on the planet. Simplicity brings out the best in humanity and allows the awakening in which we experience our connection to other people and nature. This leads us to behave in ways that make this world a better place. 

Here are 10 keys to living a fulfilling life of simplicity:

1. Limit material possessions to what is needed or cherished
2. Meaningful work (whether paid or volunteer)
3. Quality relationships with friends and family
4. Joyful and pleasurable hobbies
5. A conscious and thoughtful relationship with money
6. Connection to community
7. Sustainable consumption
8. Healthy living - including exercise, adequate sleep, and nutritious food
9. Practices that foster personal growth - yoga, meditation, journal writing, self-help 
10. Regular connection to nature

Naturally, specific lifestyles of simplicity will vary enormously because what each person needs or cherishes is a subjective determination.  But, if you incorporate these practices into your life, you'll be amazed at the difference you'll feel, both inside and out.

It's only been 8 years since I strapped on a backpack and embarked on my 3-year adventure in the developing world.  What I learned through these lessons of simplicity has made a profound impact on my life - one that has become even more noticeable in my current existence as a San Francisco urbanite.  Less really is more.  As more people learn the art of simplicity, and cultivate the caring that comes from it, the more we can hope for real, lasting change in our world.

"In order to change the world, you have to get your head together first."
- Jimi Hendrix

 

Lessons from the Wild #1

I recently returned from a 4-day backpacking trip in the Sierras of California.  Though I've been an avid backpacker for the past 10 years, I never cease to be inspired by the awe of a vast mountain vista, or the tranquility I feel listening to a babbling mountain stream.

John Muir once said, "In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks".

Nature teaches us many lessons. It reminds us that we need to constantly adapt to conditions, outside forces, and every day challenges in order to survive. It tells us that there will be a tomorrow and that there is beauty in simplicity. Nature is all around us, ready to teach, but many times we’re too busy with everyday life that we forget to tune in and hear what it has to say.  

As a society, we have gotten away from nature. We've moved from an agricultural country to a high-tech world filled with gadgets. Yet the current season seems ripe for many to once again get back to nature and to the land.  There's a growing desire to learn how to not only respect what nature offers us, but to learn from it, and to be in tune with it. From growing your own food, to composting, to preserving food, the time for getting back to nature is flourishing.

Every time that we choose to be in nature, we can also choose to be with nature. What's the difference? There are many people who go to nature, but don't really commune with it. When we're with nature, we become a part of it... of the whole vast and interconnected universe. We are free and playful.  Nature is creation, and when we merge with it, we merge with our own creative self.  

“Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out that going to the mountains is going home; that wildness is necessity; that mountain parks and reservations are useful not only as fountains of timber and irrigating rivers, but as fountains of life.”   - John Muir

Living the Simple Life

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." - Confucius

Simplification is about decluttering  all of your life - your schedule, home, office and mental spaces too. 

For me, the trip I took  from December 2005 to August 2008, spending the majority of my time in the developing world, was the big breakthrough.  First off, I was limited in what I could carry on my back.  This meant only the most basic of clothes, personal belongings, an iPod, camera, a few books and my journal.  That was it.  Secondly, many of the people I encountered on a daily basis had even less than I did.  And even the wealthier locals had far less than what I had stockpiled in storage back in California.  Sure, over that time, I wore through my clothes and had to buy new ones.  I bought a few new things and mailed them home.  But overall, I lost my urge for "more".  I found a pure satisfaction in the simplicity of it all.  I saw that those with less were no less happy for it.  In fact, they showed me that happiness can be found in the simplest of things.  And that many of those things don't cost a dime, or rupee, or a yen.

Returning to the U.S. came as much more of a culture shock than I ever expected.  All the excess!  Grocery stores with shelves piled high with wall-to-wall items, the cars, the fast pace of life - all of it made me want to flee.  It took nearly a year before I began to feel like an American again.  It was extremely challenging at first to embrace that simplicity here, and downright un-American.  Some would say I'm frugal, or minimalist.  I suppose I'm a combination of both.  Now, I live simply so that I can work less, create more, and save for what’s important.  I've learned to do things myself, and really well - as with sewing and becoming an even better cook.  I do splurge on occasion, because life is too short not to treat yourself.  And when I do, I enjoy it all the more.

“The simplest things are often the truest.” - Richard Bach

There isn’t one way to simplicity - there are as many ways as there are people who seek a simple life.  Some simple tips I've learned are:

Enjoy the simple things in life. The next time you eat a piece of fruit or enjoy a cup of coffee or tea, simply enjoy it. Sounds like a pretty obvious suggestion right? It is, but most of the time we do exactly the opposite. We’re not just eating or drinking, we’re thinking about all sorts of things. We’re thinking about the next thing we need to do, or the past, or future.  The next time you eat or drink, just do that. You'll experience the flavors and tastes at if it were the first time.

Reassess your priorities. Do you stress out about what’s on your to-do list more than living in the moment? We have to find a balance in achievement and contentment. Sometimes it’s not about getting what you want, but wanting what you have. It’s not about achieving the completion of a project, but enjoying the process of creativity.

Work four days a week. But how can you work only four days if you currently work five and are overloaded as it is? It’s funny, but you can somehow make it work. It’s a well-known law that our work expands to fit the time we give it … and the flip side of that is if you shrink the time, you will become more efficient, or shrink the work to fit the time. And, you’ll have an extra day off. Which will give you time for the next important tip...

Make time for what you love. We often get burnt out because we’re busy working and attending to obligations. If we are not doing anything we’re excited about, we’ll likely start resenting our lives. It’s important to make time every day doing things you really enjoy.

Single-task. This is good for those who tend to be all over the place. When you’re working on a project, stick with it.  One task at a time … finish the task … move on to the next. Try this for one day, focusing on it completely for that day. If it works for you, try it again the next day.

Deflect all requests for a week. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, make the decision that you will not say “yes” to any new requests this week. If you get a new request, politely decline. If it’s a request you can’t decline, tell them you’ll get to it next week because you have some projects you need to finish this week. Then pick one or two or even three projects (depending on their sizes) and focus on finishing them this week. You can worry about new stuff next week. 

 
Start your day with peace. It's your best bet on creating a great day. When you first rise, do something that is calming and peaceful. That might be running or walking, having a quiet cup of coffee with a book, watching the sunrise, meditating or yoga … whatever works well for you. It can be 10 minutes or an hour, but find some peace in the morning and use it to calm you throughout your entire day.

30-day rule. This is a great trick for those who have trouble with impulse buying - that great enemy of simplifying. The rule is that if you want to buy something, you have to write it on your 30-day list, with the date that it was added to the list. After 30 days, if you still want it, you can buy it. This doesn’t apply to necessities such as groceries … which helps you distinguish between wants and needs, a great skill for simplifying.

Decluttering. Start with one area you’re trying to declutter - a room, drawer, shelf, desk, or whatever.  Label three boxes: Trash, Donate, Maybe.  Quickly go through each shelf or drawer or flat surface at once, putting things into the three separate boxes.  For the Maybe box - try not to use it if you can avoid it.  If you really can't decide, put items in and store them for 3-6 months.  If you haven't needed them in that time, then they go.  

One in, two out. When you bring something into your house, you have to get rid of two things. The normal rule is one in, one out, but somehow that never seems to work - things still accumulate. Instead, get rid of two things and things will stay simple.

You'll see some of these tips, and more, at Zen Habits.