Dealing with Change at Work

Many of us desperately crave change at work, and yet we’re uncomfortable and terrified when it occurs. But change is inevitable (and necessary for businesses to survive and thrive), so you’ll need to learn how to overcome those fears.

“There are many people who fear change at work for a variety of reasons,” says Michael Kerr, an international business speaker, author and president of Humor at Work. “Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of looking stupid and fear of the unknown.”

Most employees respond to internal changes in their work environment with nervousness and resistance because change for most people “raises questions about contribution, and they associate it with negativity,” says Sara Menke, the founder and chief executive of Premier, a boutique staffing firm in San Francisco.  “They think, What am I doing wrong to make my employer think that things should change?”  Excerpted from Forbes

It’s perfectly normal and healthy to be a bit fearful, confused or unsettled by workplace changes at first. The unhealthy part occurs with inappropriate or unhelpful responses. Fighting change or presenting a negative attitude will not help you transition through the process. The intelligent and mature strategy is to look for avenues to adjust to the change and thrive in the new environment.

It's also helpful to talk with colleagues, your partner, or your friend.  This will not only make you feel better, but remind you that you’re not alone. And designate “worry time.” Worrying interferes with your productivity and overall mood, so don’t let it spill over into every part of your work day. If you’re worried about the changes, designate a time each day when you’re going to focus on those fears - preferably outside of the work day. But also use that time to overcome those fears.

Change is hard - hard enough when it's self-imposed, but much more nerve-wracking when it's brought on from where you earn your livelihood. By applying these insights, you really can navigate change gracefully and use it to your advantage.

How To Change Your Life: Step 5

Step 5 - Enjoy the change. If you don’t do this, you might as well give it up. If the daily action feels tedious and chore-like, then you're doing it wrong. You've got to find a way to enjoy the change, or you won’t stick to it and make it a permanent habit. Habits can't be changed changed overnight - remember, it takes 30 days to 3 months to establish a new habit. Check out this TED talk to hear more.

It can be quite a process to change the way you have done things your entire life. Don’t give up and don’t get down on yourself if you aren’t always able to follow through. Consider each relapse a chance to learn what to do more effectively next time. Trust that change will happen when you really want it to.  You may doubt yourself when it comes to following to your heart, but the more you do it, the easier it becomes. The sooner you embrace an attitude of curiosity, the sooner you will start trusting yourself. So what if you make mistakes or relapse? Who cares?

Make a commitment to yourself and really find that motivation to make change a priority. Stick with it, and keep working to recondition behaviors. Notice what’s working and what’s not working. When it is not working, change your approach. Keep changing until you finally achieve what you are committed to.

What daily change will you make today?

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.” – Benjamin Spock

How To Change Your Life: Step 4

Step 4 - Have consequences.  One of the best motivators for following through on your new daily habits is to have consequences.  These need to be determined by you, and be something significant enough to be a real motivator.  Maybe it's giving up something you really love (a series episode or a favorite food), donating to a cause you hate (opposing political candidate), or creating some sort of humiliation (singing karaoke to a crowd or dressing like a freak for a day).  Think of it as a type of "grounding" you had when you were a kid.  Remember, those tactics worked!
  The consequences can also be positive — a big reward each week if you don’t miss a day. Make the consequences bigger if you miss two straight days, and huge if you miss three.

"Nothing is worth doing unless the consequences may be serious." - George Bernard Shaw

Effective consequences need to be proactively built into the contract, and it's best to put them in writing. Post them. Review them and give general reminders when you sense that a little prevention could be valuable. 

Having consequences is also a great strategy in wise decision making. Remember that every single decision you have ever made, or will ever make, has consequences. Once you learn to evaluate your decisions based on consequences, all the other considerations fall neatly into place. All you need to do is think before you decide. Regardless of your past decision making abilities, you can quickly become a wise decision maker. This simple practice will help you avoid untold pain and regret.

What daily change will you make today?

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences."  - P. J. O'Rourke

How To Change Your Life: Step 3

"And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been."   - Rainer Maria Rilke

Step 3 - Be accountable. How you do it don’t matter - you can post to Facebook or Twitter, email someone, mark it on a calendar, report in person - just make sure you’re accountable each and every day, not each month. If you get public with it, and know eyes are on you, you'll be more likely to stick with the change.  Having another person out there that is expecting you to be updating them on your success can make all the difference in how you plan to tackle those goals.

When we're accountable to someone else for doing what we've said we would do, we get stuff done.  When we tell our boss we are going to get that proposal done by the end of the week, we do it.  When we tell a client that we’ll write that report, we deliver.  When we promise our kids we’ll throw them a birthday party, we keep our word. However, when we tell ourselves – and no one else – that we’ll ask for that raise, quit smoking, or start exercising, we are less likely to do it. It can be as simple as asking a friend, a colleague, a spouse to help you.  Make sure you're specific in telling them - what you've committed to and what you'd like them to do if you don't follow through.

Accountability cultivates integrity and responsibility. It makes you face the truth and helps you to make the necessary changes in your life, and helps to make those changes more sustainable.

Another great way to make yourself accountable is to team up with someone with similar goals. Mutual accountability is extraordinarily effective, as demonstrated by groups like Weight Watchers and Alcoholics Anonymous. Another method is to use a website like StickK which helps you share your goals.  You can also put money on the line and designate the recipient of the money if you don't achieve your goal - it could be a friend, a charity you like, or even more motivating, a charity you hate.

What daily change will you make today?

"If I could give one tip for people - it's not an exercise or nutrition regimen. It's to walk your talk and believe in yourself, because at the end of the day, the dumbbell and diet don't get you in shape. It's your accountability to your word."   - Brett Hoebel

One In, Two Out

sim·plic·i·ty  (noun)

1.  the state, quality, or an instance of being simple.
2.  freedom from complexity or intricacy.
3.  absence of luxury, pretentiousness, ornament, etc.; plainness.
4.  freedom from deceit or guile; sincerity; artlessness.

As you find yourself putting away those new Christmas acquisitions, consider what you already have.  If you're reading this blog, then you likely have more than you need.  Start the new year on a new, simpler trajectory with the One In, Two Out Rule.  Whenever you bring a new item in, you have to get rid of two others - preferably by gifting or donation, not in the landfill.  Make one of your new year's resolutions that of simplicity.

Simplicity isn't about martyrdom, or being boring.  Simplicity is all about finding the greatest value in our lives and then staying right there in that sweet spot. When we hit that sweet spot we need to really believe that any more would be excess and may even reduce the value in our lives.  This creates more space and awareness for what really matters in our lives - shelter, food, friends.  The second we lose sight of our basic needs is the second we lose the ability to embrace simplicity and enjoy our satisfaction with just enough.

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.”   - Leonardo da Vinci

 

 
Minimalism as a lifestyle looks different for everyone, but we can all experiment with minimalism similarly. Boundaries and challenges allow us to test the waters and find the sweet spot.  That sweet spot will change depending on who you are, where you live, who lives with you and what is most important to you.

Here are some tips to help you simplify:

1.  Ask yourself, could you be just as happy without this thing? You have to determine if this thing in your life is adding to your happiness/satisfaction.  If it isn’t, get rid of it right now!
2.  Determine the actual part of this thing that positively affects you. This will need to be revaluated every so often as the flow from a want to a need can be a slippery slope.

So, let's talk a bit more about the difference between a want and a need.  The difference is pretty simple, in theory.

Need - something you have to have
Want - something you would like to have

Everything that goes beyond this – a big house, name-brand clothes, fancy foods, a new car – is a want. But, we are marketed to constantly with the message that these things are really needs.  Take control of your mind and stop (literally) buying into corporate brainwashing.
Simplicity is not a destination, simplicity is about choice.  Making your own choices based on what is truly satisfying, and not simply believing what you're told.  Savor Simplicity by choosing to:

• Consume less, and don't think of items as disposable.  Remember that just because something goes in the trash doesn't mean it ever really goes away.
• Don't spend more than you earn.  Debt is the antithesis of living a life of simplicity.
• Wake up 10 minutes early and spend the beginning of your day stretching, or being quiet instead of rushing to get out the door.
• Take a digital sabbatical instead of being overwhelmed with information.
• Take charge of your worry instead of letting anxiety take over your day.
• Be unproductive instead of killing yourself to get it all done.
• Eat food that makes your body feel good instead of feeding your feelings with food that wears you down.
• Celebrate your progress instead of beating yourself up for what you haven’t achieved.
• Be grateful for who you are now, instead of guilty for who you were then.
• Measure yourself by the person you are, not the things that you get done.
• Meet up with friends instead of feeling lonely.
• Choose solitude instead of trying to navigate through the noise.
• Go outside and appreciate nature instead of cleaning your house.
• Support good people doing great things instead of complaining about bad people doing bad things.
• Dress with less, buy second-hand, or learn how to sew instead of buying lots of cheap fast-fashion.
• Give more and take less.

A clutter free home and debt free lifestyle do not necessarily result in simplicity. But both of those things are really helpful in clearing your mind and giving you more freedom to live life on purpose.  Excerpted from BeMoreWithLess.com

“It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease. Hack away

at the inessentials.”   - Bruce Lee

 

 

How To Change Your Life: Step 2

Step 2 - One Change at a Time. We need to accept that things don’t change overnight, that there’s nothing wrong with us, and that other people’s changes weren’t as easy as they might seem. A common element of failure to change is that we take on too much at once. Do yourself a favor and start with one change for a month before considering a second. Only add another change if you were successful at the first.

"If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."  - Lao Tzu

As a society, we glorify huge life overhauls. TV shows like The Biggest Loser give us the impression that we can completely transform ourselves in a relatively short period of time. This kind of rapid change is not only unrealistic, but unsustainable.  The problem is that we tend to deceive ourselves  - "I'll start on Monday!" and "I'll never do that again!"  The biggest problem with these types of self deceptions is that they don't really address the problem. The focus is on the end result instead of on the individual habits we need to change in order to transition from our current lifestyle to the lifestyle we actually want. And that’s the key: transition. The single biggest reason our attempts to change fail is because we don't give ourselves the time needed to transition.

So, start small.  Remember, one change at a time.  The time you spend daily can be as little as 10 minutes, but commit to it every day.  And try and stick with the same time every day.  This is often how our minds works with habit anyway, and makes it just that much easier to remember a new routine.

What daily change will you make today?

 

"A year from now you will wish you had started today." - Karen Lamb 

How To Change Your Life: Step 1

As the end of the year approaches, I'm beginning to reassess where I am with my goals for the year.  Did I actively work towards them?  What were my successes, and failures?  What changes do I want in my life in 2014?  Who do I want to be?

We are what we repeatedly do everyday – our habits.  We have positive habits, that empower us and are aligned with our goals, and we had bad, or even destructive habits, that prevent us from having the success and happiness we want. Most people don’t know that it takes at least 21 days to create a habit.  Most of us haven’t consciously created the habits we currently have.  We often just inherited habits from our peers or developed them at an early age.  

But, what if you could consciously create new habits that would compound over a period of time and transform your life?  The answer is - You can.  Ask yourself - What is something that I want to change in your life? What am I unhappy with? What would I like to add to my life that would enhance it? Whatever that area is, if you want to create lasting change, you need to make a commitment to consistently condition yourself the way you want to be for at least 30 days for it to become habitual.

Start by asking yourself - What do I want to be?  Write it down.  You can set a goal you'd like to achieve in a week, a year, or 10 years from now, but the you must make a daily change, or you'll never establish new habits to achieve your goal. You can make daily and monthly goals too and the steps to achieve your ultimate goals, but you must daily changes. The truth is, if you’re not willing to make it a daily change, you don’t really want to change your life in this way. 

So ask yourself - If my life had absolutely no limits and I could have it all and do whatever I wanted, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do? Describe your ideal lifestyle. List what you would do throughout the day if you knew that you were bound to be successful, what kind of person you would be, how much money you would earn, and where you would live. This question allows you to realize who you would truly want to be if there were no limits. Establish a clear and specific outcome.

So, do you know who you really want to be?  OK then, now let's talk about how to get there...

Step 1 - Select specific patterns to break and replace with new behavior
When you decide that you’re not going to stand for your current situation any longer, then it’s time to devise a plan to change your behavior. The first step is to replace the old habits with new, healthy behavior. Whenever you feel the urge to engage in your old habits or are in a situation that triggers the behavior, incorporate your new behavior pattern. For example, maybe you have a drink every night when you come home from work, and want to slow down. When you come home you need something to replace that simple habit of going to the fridge and pouring a glass of wine or beer. You must have something to fill the void and minimize initial feeling that you're missing out. What new behavior can you introduce to replace your old habit?  Can you introduce a new habit you'd like to form - some stepping stone towards achieving your larger goals - into this gap?  Maybe your goal is to get fit, or start a creative hobby. This is a great chance to not only fill the void, but eliminate your initial feelings of loss.

What daily change will you make today?

"When you lose something in your life, stop thinking it's a loss for you... it is a gift you have been given so you can get on the right path to where you are meant to go, not to where you think you should have gone."  - Suze Orman